In case you hadn’t noticed, I’ve avoided blogging these past couple of days. This is due mainly to a surfeit of bad news that is causing me to feel almost physically ill, and I simply cannot bring myself to post any more bad news today.
Since there are still a couple more days to go until it’s time for another Good News Friday post, I’ve decided to counteract all the horrible news with some silliness to start off the new calendar year.
Received by email from a good friend:
As this is the season to be jolly, it has been known for the intake of intoxicating liquid to occasionally exceed what the authorities rightly consider a reasonable level for any driver.
Over Xmas, I found myself in excellent company somewhere in the outback of North London. Conscious that a combo of champagne and several buckets of red wine might have tipped me over the legal limit, I made a strategic choice (and a first) and took a taxi home.
Sure enough on the way back to Chez Moi there was a police road block, but since it was a taxi, they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident.
This was a real surprise as I had never driven a taxi before. I don’t know where I got it and now that it’s in my garage I don’t know what to do with it.
Any suggestions? Happy New Year.
And another, all the way from the Antarctic, via Elchanan:
Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica?
Where do they all go?
Wonder no more ! ! !
It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintain a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.
If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into, and buried.
The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:
You really didn’t believe that I know anything about penguins, did you?
Or if you prefer a slightly more cynical note:
I would like to wish my readers a happy, healthy and prosperous 2014.